


Awake

by Speary



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Hand Jobs, M/M, PWP, Porn with Feelings, Sharing a Bed, Smut, post season 12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-20
Updated: 2017-08-20
Packaged: 2018-12-17 14:08:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11853186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Speary/pseuds/Speary
Summary: Dean was in the bed with his eyes closed, but he wasn’t asleep. How could he sleep in his present situation? Even with his eyes closed he knew that across the little gulf between the two motel beds was his brother, mouth agape, the low rumble of air rolling in and out of his sleeping mouth. That wasn’t why he couldn’t sleep though. The reason he couldn’t sleep was right behind him in the same bed. If Cas would just roll over, sleep facing the wall, maybe Dean would be able to sleep. What was really keeping him up though, was the fact that he just knew that Cas was absolutely facing his back and that he was absolutely not asleep.





	Awake

Dean was in the bed with his eyes closed, but he wasn’t asleep. How could he sleep in his present situation? Even with his eyes closed he knew that across the little gulf between the two motel beds was his brother, mouth agape, the low rumble of air rolling in and out of his sleeping mouth. That wasn’t why he couldn’t sleep though. The reason he couldn’t sleep was right behind him in the same bed. If Cas would just roll over, sleep facing the wall, maybe Dean would be able to sleep. What was really keeping him up though, was the fact that he just knew that Cas was absolutely facing his back and that he was absolutely not asleep.

Dean focused on the gentle sleep sounds that Sam was making. He focused on it in the hopes of finally convincing himself to sleep. Under all of that focus though, his mind picked up on the sounds of Cas’ breathing. There was no peace in his breaths, that Dean could sometimes feel ghosting over his back. Cas said he’d give him space in the bed when Sam won the right to sleep on his own.

 

Cas was apparently a liar, a lying liar that lies, actually. 

 

Dean could feel the tiny prickles in his arm that signified that he needed to roll over. He squeezed his hand into a fist, hoping to encourage a little extra blood flow. Time passed and he could still tell that Cas was awake. 

Dean opened his eyes. There was a little bit of neon blue light snaking past the black out curtains, because none of them pulled the edges all the way over the middle part. Sam had an odd blue glow in the otherwise dark room. Cas was still awake. Dean wondered why he wasn’t sleeping.

He also wondered if Cas was having nightmares of the Empty. Dean knew that he’d struggled when he first came back human and a little lost. Cas had said that sometimes when he closed his eyes that it was like the world was falling away from him again. There was something like fear in the way he said it, and Dean had never heard Cas sound afraid of anything really.

 

Well, there were a couple of times all involving Winchester deaths, but this was different.

 

Dean decided to roll over, see what was upsetting him. He made the decision slowly. He rolled onto his back first, and glanced over at Cas as he did so. Cas quickly shut his eyes, feigning sleep. The edges of Dean’s lips quirked up in a grin. Dean rolled onto his side and faced Cas.

Dean watched Cas not sleep. He waited. He focused on the breathing that came too rapidly to be contributing to a peaceful sleep. There was space between them, a few scant inches. It was nothing really. His hand could slide across the space, take up residence on Cas’ chest, just to let him know that everything was okay.

Cas squeezed his eyes shut tighter, like he was fighting the urge to just open them a little. He lost the fight. Dean watched as Cas opened his eyes. For a time they just stared at each other. They both knew they were caught, so why bother trying to hide the fact. Sam’s breathing at Dean’s back was smooth and peaceful. 

Dean wanted to ask Cas what was keeping him up, but he knew the answer. He didn’t need the words to confirm it. He could provide comfort even without words. He looked at him, at the way the blue light coming into the room seemed to highlight his features in a softer way.

Dean slid his hand slowly across the little chasm between them. He intended to press his palm to Cas’ chest, let him know he wasn’t alone, anchor him a little. Instead, Dean’s hand came to Cas’ stomach. His fingers grazed over the firm lines of muscles there. 

Cas worked out now, stomach crunches in the morning, and if Dean let his hands wander to Cas’ thighs, he wouldn’t, he’d feel the muscles there that came from the daily running that he did with Sam. He was strong, maybe stronger than Dean and Sam both. He said he had to be stronger if he was going to be of any use on a hunt. Dean thought that it might be more than that though too. 

Cas said that sometimes he just needed to blow off some store of energy that had accumulated. Dean didn’t question it, but he understood. Runners were like that. Sometimes he hit the gym with Cas for the same reasons. Sometimes it helped. Sometimes, not so much.

He still hadn’t moved his hand up to Cas’ chest. Something about the way his muscles felt beneath the thin t-shirt just did something to him. He found himself tracing the lines of muscles in a kind of pattern, letting his fingers fall into the grooves of Cas’ body just there.

Cas watched him, lips parted just a little. His eyes were wide open now. Dean kept up his gentle touches. He considered speaking, asking if he was okay. Something in Cas’ eyes told Dean that he didn’t need to speak. Sometimes the two of them said more to each other with a glance than any novel ever written. Dean wondered if he was reading him right. There was a certain heat in the look Dean was getting now. 

When Cas changed for bed, pulling on a fresh, albeit, threadbare old t-shirt that Dean had given him, Dean said nothing. When Cas opted not to pull on sweatpants over his boxers, Dean continued to say nothing. There were jokes running through his head and admonitions concerning how one should sleep next to another dude. Dean wondered if he’d made a mistake keeping all that to himself.

Cas’ tongue darted out to wet his lips. Dean’s fingers faltered in their tracing path. His own tongue darted out to mirror what Cas had done. He pressed his palm flat to Cas’ stomach and started to run his hand up to Cas’ chest like he’d planned to before.

Cas moved his hand up to Dean’s and stopped his progress. He dragged Dean’s hand back down to his stomach. Cas’ thumb and finger wrapped around Dean’s wrist a little. He moved Dean’s hand down to the space just below his belly button, and seemed to hesitate, seeing if Dean was planning to retreat.

Dean let his hand stay right where Cas had placed it. Cas’ own hand was warm on top of his. Dean flexed his fingers just a little, feeling Cas’ body a bit more beneath that shirt. Dean swallowed a little, and it sounded loud to him in the quiet room. 

Dean felt Cas’ fingers tighten on him a little, then Cas angled Dean’s hand just a bit lower. Dean’s fingers were grazing the top of Cas’ boxers. Dean licked his lips again, and this time Cas mirrored him. Dean flexed his fingers and let them slide just under the top part of Cas’ waistband. Cas sucked in a shaky breath and seemed to hold it.

Cas moved Dean’s hand again. Dean could feel the wiriness of hair. His fingers raked over the warm skin around Cas’ cock. He didn’t grab him though. Cas didn’t move him there. He let Dean’s hand go. He moved his hand to Dean’s hip and moved his own body a little closer. Dean didn’t close his hand around him even then. He waited. 

The air between them was thick and warm. Dean could feel the quick drumming of Cas’ pulse just from where his hand was sitting. Everything between them was electric in that moment. 

Dean closed his hand around him. Cas bit back a noise that was almost a moan, almost a whimper. Dean wasn’t moving yet. Each choice he’d made up to this point was slow, methodical. He watched Cas, the way his mouth was open, and breathing was ragged.  _God he was something to look at._

Dean pressed his forehead to Cas’. Dean stroked him now, just once, running his thumb over the tip of him. He watched him up close to make sure he was okay with this, that he’d be able to handle this in silence. Sam after all was still there at his back.

Cas bit his bottom lip and thrust up just a little into Dean’s fist. Dean moved again, steadily moving his hand on him, coaxing Cas ever closer to the edge. Dean’s own arousal seemed to need no further attention. He was going to chase Cas’ orgasm without ever being touched himself it seemed. He kept up the the rhythm. Dean relished the way that Cas looked. It was like it was taking all his will power to just keep quiet. 

Cas leaned back from Dean’s forehead at the end and spilled over Dean’s fist, his eyes rolling back in his head. Dean kept his hand on him for a moment more. 

Slowly Dean released him and wiped his hand off on the sheets behind him. Cas reached out to him, seemingly planning to reciprocate. Dean smiled at him.  _Little late for that._  Cas smiled back. Sam snorted in his sleep. Dean glanced over his shoulder and watched as Sam rolled over to face the window.

He turned his attention back to Cas. Dean reached out to him and brushed his fingers over his temple and back into his hair. Cas tipped his head into the touch. Dean pulled him a little closer and pressed his forehead back to him. They stayed like that for a time, breathing the same air, and settling into a new type of peace.

**Author's Note:**

> As always thank you for any kudos you feel like leaving and any kind words. You can also find me on Tumblr under the name [Spearywritesstuff](http://spearywritesstuff.tumblr.com/) or more often on Twitter under the name [Spearywrites](https://twitter.com/spearywrites)


End file.
